Thursday, May 21, 2009

Sexting: The Electronic Swine Flu Is Spreading!

Do y'all know about sexting? IITGRTAAUS911 (It Is The Greatest Threat Against America's Youth Since September 11th, 2001). Thank God the Fox news affiliate in Atlanta is here to warn parents about this horrible, totally real phenomenon. This is something that all of our children are doing on a regular basis. They're not kidding either; they are doing every single thing these acronyms spell out, and worse. Here are some Fox missed (I know because I send pictures of my dick to all my friends all the time):

COMF: Cum On My Face

PIMB: Poop In My Butt

GMART: Give Me A Rusty Trombone

(*): Clit Piercing

WOOF: Bulldog Eating Mayonnaise

80087355: Boobless

M/P: Let's Murder My Parents And Drive Around With Them In The Trunk For Four Days Before We Go Into The Desert And Have A Bonfire With Their Mutilated, Beginning-To-Decompose Bodies, Because Parents Don't Understand And Are So Stupid And We're Out Of Control Teenagers Who Actually Do Things Like This And This Is Not Some More Bullshit Media Alarmism

(That's one concise acronym!)

Can you think of any more they forgot?

Bonus Track:

The Offspring - The Kids Aren't Alright

Things were so simple back in 1998. Back then, all we had to worry about was our children shooting up their school after listening to Marilyn Manson.

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